Tuesday, 21 June 2011


Tuesday, 21 June 2011 23:27
epershand: "It was becoming an obsession" (Obsession)
It is the time of the Big Annual Work Conferencey Thing, where lots of people who do the sort of work that everyone but me does in the sales division of $EMPLOYER gathers together, listens to speeches about how awesome we are, and gets very drunk and chatty.

It's funny, every year I bitch and moan leading up to BAWCT--waste of time, who needs to hear ra ra sales pitches, it's the END OF THE QUARTER, I have REAL work to do blah blah blah--and every year BAWCT turns out to be really fun, and the schmoozing I do at the afterparty turns out to be really useful. Maybe eventually I will remember this in advance. Tonight I a bunch of people told me my main project was awesome, AND one or two volunteered to help me with it in ways that are actually useful and not a waste of my time. AND I chatted with an old colleague who is looking for a change and would be perfect for a job we're trying to fill on my team. What is this even.

Anyway THE POINT of this post was actually going to be to report a rather ridiculous dinner conversation, the real take-away of which is "if you hire a bunch of smart people, and then tell them to use their brains to come up with ways to make technical support more efficient, you are to blame for the consequences when you socialize with them."

(Coworker 1, Coworker 2, and Boss are in their 30s and have children. Coworker 3 and Epershand are in their 20s and do not.)

Coworker 1: Fortunately, the cost goes down with the age of the child, because the teacher:student ratio can drop.
Coworker 2: Yes, as the children age you can drive more scalability in your childcare solution.
Epershand: Mmmm, yes, the older ones are more easily automated. I MEAN THEY ARE MORE AUTONOMOUS.
Boss: Ok, note to self, do not let Epershand and Coworker 2 take care of my children.
Epershand: No, I just mean that you can start using more of a self-service model later on.
Coworker 3: But really, at those prices? If you have multiple children...
Coworker 1: Raising children is incredibly expensive. You absolutely can *not* do an ROI analysis before you do it. If you do the math you'll never reproduce.


In other news, 2011 appears to be the Year In Which Every Australian Epershand Knows in the US Moves Back to Australia. I learned about another one today :(((((((.


But I am totally ditching the evening portion of BAWTC tomorrow for PANIC! AT THE DISCO. I still have a couple extra tickets, so if you happen to know anyone in the Bay Area who is looking for tickets, please send them to me so I do not wind up selling them to scalpers.


epershand: An ampersand (Default)

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